“Our dependency makes slaves out of us, especially if this dependency is a dependency of our self-esteem. If you need encouragement, praise, pats on the back from everybody, then you make everybody your judge.”
How do you stay positive when everything seems to work against you? How do you stay committed when obstacles and problems test the strength of your spirit? How do you keep up your self-esteem in a hard-hitting atmosphere? It seems like everywhere you turn negativity pushes your limits. Being fully aware of things & situations that cause you pain and drain your energy is the best way to approach this issue and to stay focused. What needs your full attention are highest yielding activities and therefore the most inspiring activities. Make sense? If yes, at every opportunity you must avoid:
Poisonous Work Environment & Negative People
Eating people is wrong. Taking credit where you don’t deserve it is bad. Being arrogant is poisonous. Beware of the “dog eat dog” theory where each person is fighting just to get ahead. You don’t need to win everything. Only the most important battles. Competition would be everywhere, you will need to prove yourself, very often. You need to pick your battle fields, when and where it matters. Do not waste your energy on small issues and at all the cost make sure to play your best game when it matters the most!
Shortcomings in Other People’s Behavior
Avoid gossip mongers, whiners, back stabbers, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders… all these kinds of people will create awful feelings for you. The Simple truth is that better you are, more people will need to prove something to you. More people will have something against you. Also, your actions will be analysed more often in a direct proportion to the hierarchy of your position. Be aware who is your trusted ally, who is on your side when times are tough? No guess work here! You must know!
Hectic and Unstable Environment
Change is constant, progress is not. To much of that change will hold your progress. To little, will make you bored. Just about right amount is ideal. Accept changes as normal, but don’t challenge your paradigms. Basics remain the same, only the level fluctuates. Change is constant and you can only avoid it if you want to become history. Acceptance of it is a price you must pay to stay in the game. Sometimes it pays to hang in, solutions will pop up unexpectedly if you stay with your challenge longer than anybody else.
Past Experience Hard-wiring
You are not as good as your last assignments (work) are. Enough will be if you give your best attempt. There is absolutely no way you can please everybody! Off course you cant prove it to everybody, and you don’t need to. Don’t let the past stands in your way. Let it go, once for all, let it go! So called failures could easily change into fears of any kinds and we as humans tend to overstate negative and create issues where issues do not exist at all. Treat each failure and mistake as a valuable lesson. Failures are nothing more and nothing less than valuable feedbacks. Life is always your best teacher. Some of us are continuous learners, some of us pick up most important skills very fast. Some will never learn so they need to be reminded from time to time.
Viewing World in a Negative Context
Don’t surrender. Wrapping yourself up with all the negativities of the world could impact your self esteem and diminish everything positive in your life. Truth is that there are no problems with economy, governments, tax departments, people and businesses. Real issue is often somewhere right between your ears. Start with your thinking around the issue, identifying what else might be a problem. Face it with honesty and accept the full responsibility. Ask yourself “What is the worst thing that can happen here?” and then do whatever it takes to avoid these problems in the future. You are responsible and you are Creator.
Comparison with Others
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.”
You are Uniquely CAPABLE Individual. You have your own way of expressing your being. You need to leave your unique powerful legacy to this world. If your predecessor is a failure, it doesn’t mean you have to be a failure as well. Associate yourself with positive people that can shape your identity and character so you can become the best you can possibly be. Avoid comparison of any kind, compete only with yourself. This is a true mastery and true achievement. How successful you are is only important to you and at your measures
Not having a Plan B. or a Clean Exit Strategy
You are as free as your best options are. You can change and adopt whatever suits you to maximise your long term results. You can’t expect that everybody around you change their behaviours because of you. Only you can change your situations for a better.
Forgetting about or Abandoning your Vision
…is another self esteem killer. When you settle for less than you are capable off you trade off your full potential for something that is far less inspiring and challenging. You don’t grow, fulfilment is long gone and what prevail is short term, very often, someone else’s inspiring vision for you to live on. Stop, examine, reflect. And remember we only have one life and one life purpose to fulfil. Take results oriented action today. This is the best way to cure your fears and build a powerful self-esteem.
“Believe in your dreams and they may come true; believe in yourself and they will come true”